- TV Listings: The Return Of Eddie
TLC 10:00 p.m. EST/9:00 p.m. CST Eddie returns to Cleveland, where he hasn’t been since he was a kid, and is surprised to find they built the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame there.
- American Voices: Sweetener Makes You Dumber
A study published in The Journal of Physiology demonstrated that rats given substantial amounts of high fructose corn syrup learned and remembered less than a control group.
- HARRISBURG, PA?Josh Newton, 32, wouldn't say that Thursday was a complete waste, since he did watch nearly every video about Jeffrey Dahmer on YouTube.
HARRISBURG, PA—Josh Newton, 32, wouldn't say that Thursday was a complete waste, since he did watch nearly every video about Jeffrey Dahmer on YouTube.
- SMU Adds "Do Not Resuscitate" To Larry Brown's Contract
SMU Adds "Do Not Resuscitate" To Larry Brown's Contract
- [video] Dying Chevron Executive Excited To One Day Become Oil
The transportation secretary flips out on a pothole in Baltimore, a man wearing red glasses and pink pants is probably Dutch or something, and an Ohio Film Festival graphic designer decides to go with film reels for the O's. It's the week of May 14th, 2012.
- Baseball Officials Concerned As More And More Retired Players Begin To Show Jose Canseco?Like Symptoms
NEW YORK—In response to evidence an increasing number of former players are showing what doctors say can only be described as "Jose Canseco–like symptoms," the MLB announced Friday it was launching an investigation into whether ...
- Sportsgraphic: Famous Flops In Sports
Faking outrage or egregious injury in order to draw a penalty, once the purview of soccer players, is becoming more and more common across all sports these days.
- Magazine: That One Kid In High School Who Had A Hearing Aid: We Check And See How Bad His Hearing Is Now
That One Kid In High School Who Had A Hearing Aid: We Check And See How Bad His Hearing Is Now
- Alien Still Hasn't Gotten Around To Listening To Whole Voyager Golden Record
47 U. MAJORIS STAR SYSTEM—Roughly 18 months after discovering the collection of common Earth sounds contained on the golden record placed aboard the Voyager probe NASA launched in 1977, extraterrestrial Richard Ellinger, 237, admitted Friday ...
- American Voices: New DVR Can Skip Ads
A new DVR sold by the Dish Network comes with the capability to pass over ads and is sending shockwaves through the television industry.
- Heat Lose Chris Bosh Indefinitely To Severe Poetic Justice
MIAMI—After straining his abdominal muscles, Miami power forward Chris Bosh will be out indefinitely in what appears to be a severe case of poetic justice for his arrogant and presumptive team, sources close to the Heat confirmed Tuesday. An MRI per...
- [audio] Local Man Shot With Girly Pistol
Local Man Shot With Girly Pistol
- New Vikings Stadium's Retractable Base Moves Structure To Los Angeles As Needed
New Vikings Stadium's Retractable Base Moves Structure To Los Angeles As Needed
- Man Wearing Red Glasses, Pink Pants Probably Dutch Or Something
Man Wearing Red Glasses, Pink Pants Probably Dutch Or Something
- Bears Claim They'd Want Brandon Marshall On Their Side In Bar Fight With Woman
CHICAGO—Defending their newly acquired wideout Brandon Marshall, multiple members of the Chicago Bears organization came forward this week claiming they would want him on their side in a barroom brawl with a woman.
- WEDDINGS: Kristen Anderson and James Greene
Kristen Anderson and James Greene, both of Austin, TX, were married Friday at the city's newest wedding truck.
- Infographic: Evolution Of Obama's Gay Marriage Stance
Last week, President Obama announced he is now in favor of gay marriage and said his stance had evolved over the past two years. Here are some of the evolutionary stages of Obama's opinion: Nov. 30, 2008:
- Republicans Stalling Obama's Agenda By Speaking, Moving In Slow Motion
Democrats charge that Republican members of Congress are preventing the passage of the bills by moving very slowly.
- Cop Grudgingly Admits Suspect Is The Best Goddamn Pedophile He's Seen In 30 Years On The Force
LOS ANGELES—Veteran LAPD detective James Russo, 49, reluctantly admitted to reporters Thursday that the pedophile he is currently on the trail of is the best he's seen in his 30 years on the force.
- American Voices: Nonwhite Babies Pass White Babies In United States
For the first time in U.S. history, the number of minority babies outstripped the number of white babies.
- Statshot: Top Names For Skrillex's Haircut
Top Names For Skrillex's Haircut
- American Voices: Bush Endorses Romney
Following a speech in Washington, former president George W. Bush offered an impromptu endorsement of candidate Mitt Romney to reporters.
- Report: Caucasians Will Soon Be A Minority In Their Own Goddamn Country
PIKEVILLE, TN—According to Hormel-plant breakroom sources, if the Puerto Ricans and the Mexicans and the Orientals and the blacks don't stop having all those babies, whites will be a minority in their own goddamn country as early as 2010.
- Secretary Of Transportation Flips Out On Pothole In Baltimore
BALTIMORE—Transportation Secretary Ray LaHood went off on a 22-centimeter-wide, 8-centimeter-deep pothole Wednesday, calling it a "goddamn disgrace" and a "real piece of work that's out to make [him] look like a fool." ...
- [audio] German Luftwaffle Chain Offers Waffles, Overwhelming Air Superiority
German Luftwaffle Chain Offers Waffles, Overwhelming Air Superiority
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